Wednesday, April 2, 2008

When You Lose What You Love

When they walk through the Valley of Weeping... They will continue to grow stronger. -
Psalm 84:6-7 NLT

When you lose what you love you go through five stages:
(1) Denial - "No, it can't be happening."
(2) Anger - "God, why are You permitting this?"
(3) Bargaining - "Please make it go away."
(4) Depression - Silence and withdrawal.
(5) Acceptance - "Not my will but Yours be done."

Whether it's the loss of a child, a parent, a job, your health, a relationship, etc., when you turn to God He'll give you the grace to embrace it, grieve it, express it, release it, and go on to become stronger. Sometimes we seek quick relief by releasing it before we've gone through these stages. That's because we fear the process. We've been taught that any show of emotion is a show of weakness, so we stuff it. But we only stuff it into our emotional rubbish bin, then spend all our time and energy sitting on the lid, trying to keep the contents from spilling out. "You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free" (John 8:32). It's knowing and embracing the truth, including its painful aspects, that sets you free. You must be willing to forgive. But until you come to grips with the enormity of your loss, including any injustice of what was done to you, you are not ready to forgive. When you rush to forgive, you forgive only in part and you're released only in part.

Are you running from pain today? Are you trading it in prematurely for some other feeling? That's not God's way. Jesus said, "You will weep and mourn… but [eventually] your grief will turn to joy… and no one will take [it] away" (John 16:20-22 NIV).

This really spoke to me for a variety of reasons when Patti sent it to me. I have dealt with loss - deeply. I consider myself to be an expert of sorts because of the magnitude of my grief. I have not met anyone who really was a kindred spirit to me -walked a mile in my shoes type. That's cool because I've never desired for anyone to feel the deep sense of pain and loss that I have felt anyway.

Needless to say, I am so in the thick of the wilderness right now and God is showing me His face in a very real way these days...Probably because I am healing in a new way. I couldn't be more scared and excited about the journey that I am on. I've recognized that not everyone is equip to roll with me let alone confront these parts within themselves. It's not easy by any means, but it is so very necessary. Hindsite is truly 20/20, but everything happens for a reason. But I know I am blessed and encouraged and that my breakthrough is right around the corner. So I'm taking it all in, observing the sites and putting me and God first.

Obedience is key...This faith walk is real....the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things unseen. :) Believe That!

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